Funny Christmas Quotes For Seniors
Are you looking for some funny Christmas quotes this holiday season to send to a loved one? Here are 30 humorous quotes that perfectly sum up this special time of year.
Funny Christmas Quotes
- “One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas Day. Don’t clean it up too quickly.” – Andy Rooney
- “Christmas is like candy; it slowly melts in your mouth, sweetening every taste bud, making you wish it could last forever.” – Richelle E. Goodrich
- “That’s what Christmas memories are made from. They’re not planned, they’re not scheduled, nobody puts them in their blackberry; they just happen.” – Deck The Halls (2006)
- “Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.” – Andy Borowitz
- “Christmas to a child is the first terrible proof that to travel hopefully is better than to arrive.” – Stephen John Fry
- “Bloody Christmas, here again, let us raise a loving cup, peace on earth, goodwill to men, and make them do the washing up.’ – Wendy Cope
- “For a couple hours out of the whole year, we are the people we always hoped we would be.” – Bill Murray
- “You’re a lot like some of my Christmas tree ornaments: bright, colorful, and a little bit cracked.” – Unknown
- “A Christmas tree, the perfect gift for a guy. The plant is already dead.” – Jay Leno
- “Christmas: the only time of the year you can sit in front of a dead tree eating candy out of socks.” – Anonymous
- “It’s not what’s under the Christmas tree that matters; it’s who is around it.” – Anonymous
- “May the Christmas season fill your home with joy, your heart with love and your life with laughter.” – Anon
- “Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present.” – Unknown
- “Sending Christmas cards is a good way to let your friends and family know that you think they’re worth the price of a stamp.” – Melanie White
- “Even before Christmas has said hello, it’s saying ‘buy buy.'” – Robert Paul
- “Christmas is the magical time of year… I just watch all my money magically disappear.” – Unknown
- “If you can’t wrap Christmas presents well, at least make it look like they put up a good fight.” – Unknown
- “Once again we come to the holiday season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.” – Dave Barry
- “What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.” – Phyllis Diller
- “Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.” – Victor Borge
- “Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and receipts for all major purchases.” – Bridger Winegar
- “You know you’re getting old when Santa starts looking younger.” – Robert Paul
- “At Christmas tea is compulsory. Relatives are optional.” – Robert Godden
- “My husband’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is to become Scrooge.” – Melanie White
- “Three phases that sum up Christmas are: peace on earth, goodwill to men, and batteries not included.” – Unknown
- “Oh for the good old days when people would stop Christmas shopping when they ran out of money.” – Olivia Haigh Williams
- “Next to a circus there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.” – Frank McKinney Hubbard
- “Christmas is the season when you buy this year’s gifts with next year’s money.” – Unknown
- “Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.” – Gary Allan
- “Love is what is in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.” – Anon
More Christmas Quotes
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